It's been long since I got the mood and the time to blog. I feel like, the moment I am at the computer screen, I can't think of anything to tell! But when I am alone in my room, or in the car, or even when working, I have tonnes to say.

You know, despite of all the dissatisfaction I feel about my working environment, I actually realized one thing. I grew very dependant on God. And I can feel that God actually enjoying all the attentions that I give Him! Sounds like scary but I think it's wonderful.
I've been thinking, well, not quite a lot actually, the answer has been given me quite fast, about changing department in my working place for the past week. Should I, or should I not? Many people, including myself, encourage me to change department if I am not happy in it. Why I am not happy? Despite the kinda good salary I get compare to other departments, I find myself not growing at all! In term of skills and knowledges. I feel like as though I am stagnant. Period. Not only that, I felt like I am being used, being taken advantages of and a lot of disappointment.
I Prayed.
Because I am sure He has a reason to put me there, He won't just put me there and ask me to change department, changing department is my will but not His. I think I am not growing, but in fact, I am growing in Him, I cried out to Him everyday, I said Thank God at the end of the day, I praise Him in times of distress, I feel Him near me, I know He is here, what else shall I want? I know it's Him when I people find favor in me, when people prefer me, I know it's Him working in me.
I find my prayer life more effective, I find myself praying to know His will, to be still, to have faith even if I don't feel.
I praise Him whether I feel Him or not, because I know He is listening, He knows it. I only need to know He is here, because He is here whether I like it or not. I understand more about worship now.
I am not worship leader, I am a worshiper, anyone that can wait upon God whether he can feel Him or not, is a worshiper. I don't want credits, all glory to God.